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estdeus_innobis[Saturday, September 20th (day 482)]
[The White Chapel, morning]
I wake up and my head is cottony, and crowded. There's not enough room inside, anymore. Nothing changed -- her and me and my body, our body, where we live, it's still the same -- except that I can remember what it was like, when it was quiet, and I want to cry when I open my eyes and the noise pours in with the morning light.
Not knowing was better, easier too, and I can try to pretend it never happened, except that she's laughing and I know neither one of us is fooled. "Go away," I say, to the weight behind my eyes. "Leave me alone." A thief, with a name that's not hers to take and memories that aren't hers to keep, and I hate her. Just a second, just as quick as a blink, but the pitcher explodes in the basin anyway and I have to clean up the water before I get dressed. I hide the broken pieces under the bed and I hide the anger in the back of my head, and when I go downstairs for breakfast I can smile like I'm supposed to.
[Open to Hermia]
[CLOSED]
[The White Chapel, morning]
I wake up and my head is cottony, and crowded. There's not enough room inside, anymore. Nothing changed -- her and me and my body, our body, where we live, it's still the same -- except that I can remember what it was like, when it was quiet, and I want to cry when I open my eyes and the noise pours in with the morning light.
Not knowing was better, easier too, and I can try to pretend it never happened, except that she's laughing and I know neither one of us is fooled. "Go away," I say, to the weight behind my eyes. "Leave me alone." A thief, with a name that's not hers to take and memories that aren't hers to keep, and I hate her. Just a second, just as quick as a blink, but the pitcher explodes in the basin anyway and I have to clean up the water before I get dressed. I hide the broken pieces under the bed and I hide the anger in the back of my head, and when I go downstairs for breakfast I can smile like I'm supposed to.
[CLOSED]
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