Cities like this have no shame, have no shame...indeed, why should they?

[catherineknight.livejournal.com]

[Late morning, Tuesday, February 23rd, day 268]
[The Abbey]


Word came today that the man in jail was hung. I'm glad. The Bible says "an eye for an eye", after all, and any man who would do as he did deserves nothing but God's final judgment. Even so, I'm not sorry that Isidore and I defended him against the rioters. Justice has its own process, and there's no reason for so many people to damn themselves.

We did receive a reprimand from the sheriff for riding into the crowd and for harming some of the townsfolk, even if they deserved it. Though to my mind, if they came out of their homes to do battle and cause harm they should have been equally prepared to receive it. But I suppose not everyone feels the same. I also asked about the flaming monster we battled, but there was no further sign of it, and she avoided the subject. We apologized for any injuries caused, and she thanked us for trying to help, and so it goes.

I didn't go to the execution. I saw no need to.

The event hasn't changed the routine any. There are still chores to be done, work to be finished. Humming under my breath, I heft the bale of hay over my shoulder and quicken my pace towards the stables. Later maybe I'll take Hirondelle for a ride.


[OPEN to TARQUIN and anyone at the abbey]

Comments

[tarquinexcolo.livejournal.com]

It's been lonely hiding out from, well, from the whole world I suppose. I haven't wanted to meet the two guys that left me in a bit of a battered state, and I haven't had anywhere else to go. Today though? Today is warm and bright and sunny, and I'm tired of eating from the generosity of random passers by, not that there have been many of those, so not that I've had a lot to eat. Stretching my legs feels like a damn good idea, so I do just that, opening the door of the abandoned house that I'm calling home for now, and walking out. I'm trying to avoid busy thoroughfares, and I'm telling myself that I've no idea where I'm going, that I'll land wherever I land, but deep down I'm heading for the Abbey, heading for another meal.

I was offered a bed there, but I hate the idea, I'm really averse to the thought of sleeping somewhere religious, being surrounded by religious people, the idea that it could be stifling, that I could lose my freedom, that I could incur a debt that I could never pay back. Much like the debt I owe Jarmyn now. With a shock of realisation, I find that the coat I have slung over my shoulders is in fact his coat. I need to return this, I shouldn't still have it. It was a loan, not a gift. I make a mental note to return it to him sooner rather than later, and look up from my steady contemplation of the ground, to see what must be the Abbey.

[catherineknight.livejournal.com]

It's a beautiful day, and I thank God for it. Isidore and I trained this morning, and I'll train more with Hirondelle later. And then I think she and I will go to the park for a quiet ride. Yes, that seems a good way to spend such a fine day.

As I walk towards the stables, I see someone approaching the gate. There's something familiar about the figure. Is it...I think it might be Tarquin.

[tarquinexcolo.livejournal.com]

I see a woman walking towards the stables, almost silhouetted. I think she sees me, then I realise, it's Catherine. I'm quite tempted to turn and run, because I'm really not... but then why did I come here if not to see her. Keeping my feet from running with an immense force of will, I turn onto the path and walk towards her, trying not to seem too eager or too afraid.

[catherineknight.livejournal.com]

It is Tarquin. Oh, God is truly smiling upon me today. Smiling, I sling the hay bale from my shoulder to the ground and arm sweat from my forehead. "Tarquin!" I call, waving. "Tarquin, come in! How are you?"

[tarquinexcolo.livejournal.com]

Well there goes any hope I had of turning and running away as fast as possible in the opposite direction. Catherine calls and waves at me, and I speed up and walk towards her, "Hello, I'm... alright. And yourself?". Maybe I'll get a meal, I could do with one, god knows.

"Sorry I haven't been by before. I know it's been a while, I've been... busy". I recollect on recent events, being beaten unconscious, having my life saved by some gruff bartender, a night in prison. Busy? Sure.

[catherineknight.livejournal.com]

He pauses, but then quickens his pace and approaches me. I'm smiling broadly. He came. He listened to me and he came. And maybe now he can be saved. "Hello, I'm...alright. And yourself?" He says.

"I'm very well," I reply. "I'm just hauling some hay to the stables. The animals eat a great deal." I wonder how Tarquin has been eating. He doesn't look like he's gained any weight.

"Sorry I haven't been by before. I know it's been a while, I've been... busy"

"That's alright. You're here now." I grin. "Are you hungry?" I see Brother Nanse-Kam standing off to the side. He waves but doesn't approach, and I appreciate it. I know he wouldn't mind if I offer Tarquin a meal, though. "The food here is very good."

[tarquinexcolo.livejournal.com]

She smiles at me and her smile is infections. I glance at her and say "that'd be... nice. Yeah, I'd like that". I've done it. I've stooped so low that I could be accused of taking charity. Only way I can keep telling myself I'm not taking charity is because she invited me. Like a friend.

There's a man standing nearby waving awkwardly, he looks friendly enough so I smile and wave back at him, glancing at Catherine as if to be sure I have permission to do so.

[catherineknight.livejournal.com]

Tarquin finally returns my smile, and it lights his whole face. "That'd be... nice. Yeah, I'd like that" He is still hungry, poor Tarquin. I wonder where he's been staying, these last few days. If he's had to sell himself again.

He glances at me, as though for permission, and waves at Brother Nanse-kam. I smile back encouragingly. "That's Brother Nanse-kam. He's one of the monks here at the abbey. Here;" I heft the hay bale; I can carry it alone, but I think it might make him feel better to help with the work. "Help me get this to the stables, then I'll introduce you to him, and we can eat. Does that sound good?"

[tarquinexcolo.livejournal.com]

She hands the hay bale towards me and without thinking I swing it onto one shoulder, leaving the other arm free, and support it with my hand. I might not have eaten but I've kept up with my body and I've kept it strong. "I'd like to meet him. That would be nice. And I'd like to eat, if I may?"

I'm trying to be mature about this, not give into my usual tarquinesque panic about being social or accepting things. I also want to meet the man. He looks nice.

[catherineknight.livejournal.com]

Tarquin takes the hay bale with no hesitation, slinging it over one shoulder. He's stronger than he looks, for such a slender boy. I wave to Brother Nanse-kam and indicate where we're going; I'll bring Tarquin back to introduce him before we go to eat. It's only polite, after all. "I'd like to meet him. That would be nice. And I'd like to eat, if I may?"

Of course, he's hungry. "We'll just finish getting this to the stables, and then we'll eat. Okay?"

Hirondelle whinnies a greeting as we enter, her smooth white head hanging over the door to her stall. I stroke her neck and smile. "Just set the hay over in the corner with the other bales, Tarquin. Then we can go eat. Novice John will feed the horses." I can hear them, stirring and whickering in their stalls, every so often giving the wall an ill-tempered kick. They're hungry today. But then, aren't they always?

[tarquinexcolo.livejournal.com]

I nod, happy to be walking along carrying this, happy that the weather is somewhat bearable. "Always hungry, much like me then!" I quip, and smile freely. I really want Catherine to realise I'm not just a skittish terrified kid, I'm also a gentle, confident man, and I want to meet the man with the lovely smile. He looks interesting. Thoughtful.


I'm amazed at the feeling of peacefulness this Abbey seems to exude, how calm I feel, when normally in religious spaces I get angry and tense. I feel good here.

[catherineknight.livejournal.com]

"Always hungry, much like me then!" Tarquin grins, and I laugh. Novice John nods to us as he comes to fetch the bales, and I give Hirondelle's neck a final pat.

"Come on, Tarquin. I'll introduce you to Brother Nanse-Kam, and then we shall go eat." I clap him on the shoulder as we leave the stables, walking out into the cool air of winter. "The food here is very good. If I wasn't working so hard I'd probably have gained thirty pounds by now." I joke. The food IS good here, and I know no one will mind if Tarquin eats as much as he wants. Hopefully he'll stay afterwards...

Brother Nanse-Kam has stayed where he was. I hoped he would. I lead Tarquin up to him and nod, "Good morning, Brother Nanse-Kam. This is Tarquin, he's a friend of mine from town. Tarquin, this is Brother Nanse-Kam, one of the monks of this abbey." I know Brother Nanse-Kam will be kind to Tarquin. He's a very good, gentle man.

[nansekam.livejournal.com]

Catherine brings over the boy.

"Morning, Catherine," I say. "Nice to meet you, Tarquin." I offer him my hand. "Not seen you here before. You come for a look round or just to see Catherine?" He's a skinny sort of boy. Wonder if he's a charity case Catherine's picked up. But that's part of what we do here, so it's alright. "It'll be lunch soon, if you want to stay and have a bite to eat."

[tarquinexcolo.livejournal.com]

Catherine offers to introduce me to the smiling man, and then promises me food, which sounds like a deal I'm content with. I shake hands with him, Nanse Kam apparantly, and answer his politely worded question "I'm here to see Catherine sir, but I wouldn't mind a look around". He invites me to stay to lunch and a broad smile crosses my face; I'm hungry.

"Yes please sir, I'd like that"

I'm trying to hard to be mature about accepting charity. It's being made easier by the fact that this space feels peaceful, and safe

[catherineknight.livejournal.com]

Brother Nanse-kam offers Tarquin his hand, smiling. "Nice to meet you, Tarquin. Not seen you here before. You come for a look round or just to see Catherine?"

Tarquin seems a bit uncertain, but he takes Brother Nanse-Kam's hand and shakes it. "I'm here to see Catherine sir, but I wouldn't mind a look around."

Brother Nanse-Kam nods. He's always been so welcoming to everyone who comes here, including me. "It'll be lunch soon, if you want to stay and have a bite to eat."

That immediately cheers Tarquin up. He grins brightly and nods, "Yes please sir, I'd like that"

"Come on then, we can go together," I smile, patting Tarquin's shoulder. We walk together to the rectory, to one of the empty tables. People are already starting to file in for the midday meal, and I can smell fresh bread and stewing fish. My stomach growls; I'm hungry too.

We sit, and one of the novices brings out baskets of bread and small cups of butter. "Please eat, Tarquin. How have you been?" Have you been eating? Where have you been staying?

[nansekam.livejournal.com]

The boy's polite, and Catherine seems happy to have him here. Not sure I've seen her smile so much before.

"Alright," I say. "A tour it'll be, after you've had a chance to eat."

We go in for lunch, and as we go in I step to the side and ask someone to make sure the boy's bowl is filled to the brim. He looks starving, poor lad. We find a table, and there's a ring of a bell before Ash says a short grace. No standing on ceremony here, cos then we're straight in to the food. I tear a piece of bread and dip it in the stew. Good stuff.

[tarquinexcolo.livejournal.com]

I walk in with the woman and the smiling man, into a building. Suddenly I feel trapped, like I'm going into this religious place and I don't do religion, and I want to turn and run and forget that I ever came here, but something keeps my feet going, and eventually I'm sitting down. Catherine asks me several questions and I feel like I should answer them before I tear into the food but god I want to.

"I've been alright, bit of a beating a while back but I recovered, guy called Jarmyn fixed me up and fed me, been sleeping in an abandoned house and sorting my own food"

[catherineknight.livejournal.com]

We sit, and I see Brother Nanse-Kam makes sure that Tarquin's bowl is filled to the brim. I'm very glad; at least today he'll have a good meal. And maybe more, if he stays. I bow my head as we say grace, praying in my own mind to the one true God, and then we settle to eat. The air is filled with the clink of cutterly and the soft chatter of many voices.

I'd hoped that here Tarquin would be more relaxed, but he seems to have tensed up. He stares at the stew hungrily, but doesn't eat. "I've been alright, bit of a beating a while back but I recovered, guy called Jarmyn fixed me up and fed me, been sleeping in an abandoned house and sorting my own food."

"Beating?" I say, startled. I was in the middle of taking my own dishes and spoon out of my bag - I always keep them with me, just in case - but now I pause. "You were attacked?"

[nansekam.livejournal.com]

"I've been alright, bit of a beating a while back but I recovered, guy called Jarmyn fixed me up and fed me, been sleeping in an abandoned house and sorting my own food"

"You were beaten up?" I say, just as Catherine says "you were attacked?" I raise my eyebrows. "Town can be a rough place, mate, especially to new folk at the moment." I notice he's not eating. "Tuck in, kid, you can tell us all about it once you've got some food down you."

[tarquinexcolo.livejournal.com]

Thanks be, they let me eat before cross-questioning me on what happened, giving me time to downplay it. The last thing I want is all that brought up again, or me being forced to stay here as a result of it. the food is surprisingly good, but I eat slowly, trying to savour it. I don't want to talk about it, about how I felt, but I know I'm going to have to.

"Was my own fault, I was looking for work, and asked the wrong person. I'm fine now". I brush them off. I'm really scared to go into this, I just... I don't even know why.

[catherineknight.livejournal.com]

"Town can be a rough place, mate, especially to new folk at the moment." Brother Nanse-kam says, before encouraging Tarquin to eat. Tarquin does eat, surprisingly slowly, but he's obviously hungry.

"Was my own fault, I was looking for work, and asked the wrong person. I'm fine now." Tarquin replies, not meeting our eyes. So he is still selling himself, then. But even so...

"Did you tell the sheriff?" I hope so. Or at least, tell me. I'm assuming some stupid small-time thug. I wouldn't hurt him badly, but I would give him something to think about.

[nansekam.livejournal.com]

"Was my own fault, I was looking for work, and asked the wrong person. I'm fine now."

I'm turning over what sort of looking-for-work might end up in a beating. Got an idea or two, and I look at him thoughtfully before turning to my own stew.

"Did you tell the sheriff?"

"She's a decent sort, from what I hear. Met the deputy before - good bloke, trustworthy. Very tall," I add, and take a bite of bread.

[tarquinexcolo.livejournal.com]

"The deputy knows, yeah, not really daring to show my face in town at the moment, easier to hang back a bit, you know? Need to get my hands on a weapon, something I can look after myself with. Got blindsided"

I chew on my bread and grin. "It's all over now. What are you doing with yourself at the moment?" I glance at Catherine, and hope I won't get any more of these probing questions

[catherineknight.livejournal.com]

Brother Nanse-kam agrees with me that it would be good to tell the sheriff. He also says that her deputy is a good man. I wish that I could've met him, but I suppose he was busy on the day I was at the office.

Tarquin nods, at least. "The deputy knows, yeah, not really daring to show my face in town at the moment, easier to hang back a bit, you know? Need to get my hands on a weapon, something I can look after myself with. Got blindsided." He grins at me through a mouthful of food. "It's all over now. What are you doing with yourself at the moment?"

"Working here," I say, pouring my stew into my bowl. "There's always work to be done here, but it's good work. Satisfying. I've been attending services at Father Laurence's church..." it's good to hear Mass spoken again. "And now that Hirondelle is back at full health, we've been training again. I've missed that. We haven't trained properly since we left the order." I want to ask about Tarquin carrying a weapon, which doesn't sound terribly safe to me...but I don't want to scare him off.

[nansekam.livejournal.com]

Nice bright day today, though I've mostly been indoors weaving apart from my exercise first thing. I finish teaching the class I give the novices, and later on today I'll actually be able to get on with some proper weaving - can't get much done with the novices flapping about being all earnest and useless, Nanshe bless them.

Stroll out to stretch my legs, and I see Catherine. She and Isidore have made good additions to the abbey - they may not be official members, but they pull their weight. She's chatting to a boy, and I wave at them both but don't go over just yet. Give them a chance to catch up - boy looks easily spooked.