Make hay while the sun shines

[goddessnanshe.livejournal.com]

Mid-afternoon of Tuesday, 29th June
The Abbey

It's a bright warm day, and the church, my church, rings with the sound of a community in song. Every pew is filled, and there are even people standing at the back of the church and spilling onto the porch, leaning into the doorway to hear Ash's words, and singing out familiar hymns of summer and farmwork through the stone of the church and out into the bright air. Some of our farmers - I know them all by name, John Hale, Jasper Thornton, Lucille Cliff, Alex Brown, their dreams familiar to me as neighbours - bring a bale of new hay to the altar in offering, and my throat is tight.

Please, I pray. Please let their prayers be granted. May I still be able to do some good.

It's strange, to be able to feel such joy and such grief at once. I have such pride in my people, and such helpless frustration at what I have become.

The service ends, and everyone goes into the fresh air. Tonight they will dance together at the new hall, kick up tired heels and shake out aching muscles into new, pleasanter aches of dancing and socialising and celebrating after hard labour. For now, our community here has moved tables out from the dining hall into the yard, and the congregation has brought pies and cider to share. Children run giggling between the tables, hay in their hair, and I laugh looking at them, and feel a terrible tender pain in my heart, wanting them to be as safe as this always.

[open]

Comments

[mistresswanda.livejournal.com]

"I wish life were like baking, so you could set out all the things you needed and mix them together and time everything to come out perfectly."

"Then there would be no pleasant surprises." I sigh, and manage to give her a smile. "After all, for every souffle that falls, there's a strawberry shortcake that is sweeter than you can imagine." I think I'll leave brownies out though... brownies are wickedly bad. I shouldn't miss brownies.

There's a slight lull, and I feel like I should say something about her and Jamie. Or that I should go drag Jamie here right now...

"Anything I can do?" I think that's the safest question I could ask right now.

[janeveniver.livejournal.com]

"I don't like surprises," I grumble, but she's gotten me thinking about strawberry shortcakes now. Those would sell very well, and the strawberries are ripe just now.

I can see Wanda's thinking, so I try to prepare myself for whatever she might ask about. It's seems she's at as much of a loss as I am right now, though. "I'll take a cup of tea from you tomorrow morning," is all I can think of to ask for.

I pick at my pie for a bit before asking, "What are you going to do with your basement now?" I think I know her well enough to ask that, and I am curious.

[mistresswanda.livejournal.com]

Nod my head at her request. "Done. I'll even make my strawberry scones with clotted cream." Food fixes everything. Momentarily at least.

"What are you going to do with your basement now?"

Geeez, I go for the safe question, she goes for the throat.

"Do what most people do with their basement I suppose. Use it to store the things you don't have any use for any---" My voice catches. Dammit. Damn Him. Deep breath and bright smile. "Storage, I suppose."

Just another part of me to pack away, at least now I have somewhere to put it.

[janeveniver.livejournal.com]

"Really?" I can't help smiling when Wanda offers scones as well as tea. It'll be nice to eat something I didn't have to make, and I've heard she's a good baker.

I probably shouldn't have asked about the basement. Wanda's carefree sounding answer breaks down right in the middle, and I see her pull herself together. "I'm sorry," I say quickly, and reach out to touch her hand. "It's none of my business. It's just, um, does Dorian like the sorts of things you used to do down there? Because I don't know if I can, um, do that." And she must know what an imperfect idea I have about what exactly that is.

[mistresswanda.livejournal.com]

She apologizes and touches my hand, and while I smile gratefully, I curse myself for showing the momentary weakness. I'll have to get better at getting a handle on that.

"It's just, um, does Dorian like the sorts of things you used to do down there? Because I don't know if I can, um, do that."

"Dorian's never been in my basement." I say almost automatically, then curse inwardly again for speaking so freely. But then again, it is the truth. There was that one time with Dorian and Lucien, but I don't think that was "the norm", as it were.

"I don't think Dorian's into that. There weren't many, that were. Not really." Not the way I wanted it, anyway.

"Just be yourself, that's probably what attracted him to you in the first place." I think that's the best advice I can give.

[janeveniver.livejournal.com]

I am quite pleased to hear that Dorian never took advantage of the services she offered in her basement, though I try not to show it. Dorian does whatever he pleases and both of us know it.

She sounds sad, which I suppose I can understand. Perhaps Mr. Whitman was the only one, and now he's gone. "It...doesn't have to hurt very much, does it?" I ask cautiously, thinking aloud. "What you did, I mean." I can feel my face getting hot.

"As long as I'm myself in clothes he chooses," I add to Wanda's, because it's Dorian. She knows how he is.

[mistresswanda.livejournal.com]

"It...doesn't have to hurt very much, does it?"

Well, I suppose if I had never really cared---

"What you did, I mean."

Oh, right. That.

"It doesn't have too, I suppose." But, what's the fun in that? Smile, but it's more to myself. "Boss him around, tie him up, make him do your bidding." Kiddie stuff, but I am guessing it's more Jane's speed. Now I am wondering if Dorian would have enjoyed some time down in the basement... pity we never got to find out.

"As long as I'm myself in clothes he chooses,"

"You should be yourself in whatever your wearing. But as I said, he does have good taste..." Chuckle a little, but my lightness for the day is gone. Too many heavy thoughts.

"Wonder if Rose has managed to charm the whole Abbey yet?"

[janeveniver.livejournal.com]

I give Wanda a doubtful look at the idea of making Dorian do anything, but maybe I could do it in bed. That's the sort of thing we're talking about, after all. "He has excellent taste, most of the time," I agree, and we laugh a little together.

Wanda mentions Rose, and I look around for the baby. Surely it's time she had a nap. I stand up, smoothing my tunic. I should be getting home. "I'll see you tomorrow," I tell Wanda. "I'm looking forward to those scones."

[mistresswanda.livejournal.com]

After one more laugh about Dorian, Jane stands up and smiles back down at me.

"I'll see you tomorrow, I'm looking forward to those scones."

"Tea and scones and lunch. You got it." I nod back and wave as she moves away. Look around and see Noma chatting with Deputy Hollow, and Rose settled happily between them. I probably should go and collect her...

in a minute.