All the art of living lies in a fine mingling of letting go and holding on.

[iago-excolo.livejournal.com]

[Saturday, June 19th (Day 384)]
[Early afternoon, Main Street]

Iago's having lunch at the Miskatonic Cafe, when Jarmyn stops by his table.   Despite being wary of Iago's sharp tongue, Jarmyn decides to sit down anyway, along with the newly-arrived Leah.  Iago gleefully takes the opportunity for what it is and needles Jarmyn mercilessly in front of their confused table-mate, and without realizing it, the rest of the cafe, as well. 

Glass arrives, looking for her own meal and quickly notices the tense duo before settling at a nearby table.  She's within hearing range and catches various snippets of their back-and-forth conversation, much to her amusement and consternation.

Meanwhile, Iago's practically dared Jarmyn into apologizing to Glass.  The cafe patrons and Iago are riveted.  Jarmyn gives it a shot but Glass isn't interested and after a tense moment, he returns to Iago's table.  It only get worse from there, and after another tense exchange, Iago leaves the table and joins Glass at hers.  The estranged couple agree to leave the cafe and are currently strolling along Main Street while they talk.

[continued from here]

~ ~ ~

"You set aside him beating me 'til I'd've died in our bed with my brain crushing against my skull and you'd not forgive him running afraid of you?"

I shake my head, curious as I ask, "Glass, if it bothered you so much, the beating he gave you, then why did you take him as a lover in the first place?  I feel like you're angry with me for it but I didn't make that choice for you."  My voice is quiet as I continue, "I won't disagree that I thought it the right thing, setting things aside so we could have the relationship I thought we both wanted." I'm regretful as I add, "If you didn't want it, I wish I'd realized it then.  I wouldn't have encouraged it otherwise."

When she mentions 'running afraid', I chuckle lightly, vaguely amused as I shake my head again.  "There are none that fear me, love, least of all, him. That's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard." I scowl, recalling my conversation from the cafe with Jarmyn and continue, "As for the louse, I didn't say it was fine or right, not now and not when it happened.  I've told him so as well.  Today even."

I pause, swallowing my disappointment at her words before quietly asking, "Love, I'm confused. You tell me you love me but we can't live together?"  I sigh, taking a long drag.  "I disagree. You're not helping me by pushing me away."  Curious about her perspective, I ask, "Is it helping you any?"

[Open to Glass]

Comments

[glass-beddau.livejournal.com]

Dorian. I remember that, some bitterness to the nightnow but I remember. "Not angry with you over that," I say, lifting my chin a little. "That was mine." Not disputing that, whatever my reasons, and there's a bloody tangle of them.

"I won't disagree that I thought it the right thing, setting things aside so we could have the relationship I thought we both wanted--"

Wait.

What?

And he's carrying on blithe, "If you didn't want it, I wish I'd realized it then. I wouldn't have encouraged it otherwise."

"If you thought it was a relationship he was after, didn't hear it from you during the week and a half after that night that he was staying clear of us," I say dry. "No. You were worrying after him threeday after it happened. You telling me that even then you thought I was after taking up with him? Did you take my hating what the Shuck and Verdandi did to him more'n I hated what he did to me to be bloody invitation on my part?"

Back again to matter of Dorian, and his nature--could swear he's part spoilt cat, really. "There are none that fear me, love, least of all, him. That's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard," and the look of irritation I shoot Iago fades when I see he means it. It's Dorian Gray; he needs to dose himself to say he'd be wounded by being set aside and even then can't bring himself t'say any ways most other would understand, and Iago thinks there's no fear there? You could sneak up on the man and cry household and he'd vanish for another month.

"As for the louse, I didn't say it was fine or right, not now and not when it happened. I've told him so as well. Today even," and fine the words, but in the moment as it happened...

"You were fine with it then," I say quiet. "Less he forced you onto himself, and you never told me if he did." It's starting to rain, a little. Streets are emptying out some, between that and the time and us moving east.

"Love, I'm confused," he says. "You tell me you love me but we can't live together? I disagree," and then on to "You're not helping me by pushing me away." Yes, well, bloody sorry it had t'come t'this as the only way to even begin to give him less chance to tear himself up, but I'm still not seeing it as a wrong. "Is it helping you any?"

"It's leaving me surer you won't tear yourself up over some whim you imagine I have," I say quiet, "or ignore what I actually do mind. That's some help t'me; I'm considering it help t'you. And I don't trust you, as I used to. Easier to weight that out calm, when I'm alone."