You Wither, You Blister, I Watch You Burn and Peel

[lugh-thecelt.livejournal.com]

Silk Road
Late Afternoon, Wednesday 14 October

He left today.

Eris has spent all day in the courtyard. I tried talking to her. I tried moving her. Nothing works. I can't imagine the pain she's in. Can't imagine how personally she takes his leaving, even when she shouldn't. I know she feels like we always leave her.

Ares may have. I will not.

Left the ranch earlier this afternoon. Needed to vent my own anger, my own pain. Ares shouldn't have left her. Left us.

I know where he is. Shadow has seen him.

Hera better not have lied to me...

So, here I am. Alone. On Silk Road. The rage boils barely under my surface. I snarl at some kids and they rush off to the other side of the street. An old woman shakes her head at me disapprovingly. I make her think I look like a wolfman.

I hate this fucking town.

[OPEN]

[CLOSED]

Comments

[brotherlaurence.livejournal.com]

This is not good. This is not good, I think to myself. I need to talk to Lúgh. I don't think this exorcism is going to work. I have the rite, but with just me and him? It can't work. Lúgh can't have faith in another god and it is faith that is the most powerful weapon here. He isn't in his office. I'm not surprised, really. I can't remember the last time I saw that building occupied. I'm turning away from the door when I feel this awful dread that causes me to finger the rosary beads in my pocket as I turn.

Well, I found him.

[lugh-thecelt.livejournal.com]

I think about going to the office but I don't want to write. What's it fuckin' matter. My head is down, hands in my pockets. The heels of my boots clack against the cement sidewalk. Someone's ahead of me. I raise my eyes, the beginnings of a snarl already turning up my lip.

[brotherlaurence.livejournal.com]

Oh, he's snarling. It's like the man--god is wearing a sign that says "stay far away" and here I am looking for him. I am an idiot. Of course, I'm pretty sure what we're planning will kill me anyway, so really it's all just details at this point.

[lugh-thecelt.livejournal.com]

My fists ball when the man doesn't move. Stands in the middle of the sidewalk. In my way. I bring my eyes to his, the stupid fuc--

"Laurence," I say, fists still tensed, voice harsh, face slightly twisted with anger.

[brotherlaurence.livejournal.com]

"Lúgh," I say in a calm and steady voice, even though he looks ready to clock me. I should be terrified, I suppose, but I find that the peace I have found lately has made me less concerned about my death. It is the doubt in myself that I am left with. "You look angry," I say gently, as if he were a parishioner.

[lugh-thecelt.livejournal.com]

"Lúgh. You look angry." Just like that. He says it calmly. It's a fact. Not something he fears. Fuckin' guy's a priest through an' through.

"Aye. An' your standin' in my way." Fuckin' exorcism or no, I'll kill 'im.

Maybe.

[brotherlaurence.livejournal.com]

I tilt my head a little to the side and take a good look at him.

"We need to talk," I say. It can wait, yes, but not for long and if he, himself, needs someone to talk to, I am more than happy to do so. It is strange how quickly I've started to think of him as human when I know that he is not.

[lugh-thecelt.livejournal.com]

I stare at him, silently fuming, for a long time. Take a deep breath and relax my fists. He reminds me so much of Father Donahue. Peaceful and composed even when faced with an irate god. If I didn't know better, I'd think this Laurence does his god proud.

"All right, Father. Suppose you're right. Why do we need to talk?"

[brotherlaurence.livejournal.com]

I study him as he stares at me, the fire in him burning hot. When he takes in a deep breath, the fire dies down a bit and he relaxes visibly, if not mentally.

"All right, Father. Suppose you're right. Why do we need to talk?" he asks.

"You are very angry. That is reason enough for me," I offer. Then, to delay his wrath, I add, "And of course there is the matter we discussed earlier."

[lugh-thecelt.livejournal.com]

"You are very angry. That is reason enough for me." It sounds like an offer almost and my hand flexes into a fist again. "And of course there is the matter we discussed earlier." Smart move, Father.

"Uh, huh. You backin' out?"

Wouldn't surprise me. Hell, if I were him and really stopped to think about how dangerous it'd be, I'd back the fuck out, too.

[brotherlaurence.livejournal.com]

"Uh, huh. You backin' out?" he asks, not sounding surprised in the least at the idea. He doesn't know me very well.

"Not at all. I have run into a slight problem, though." I glance about the street and look back at Lúgh. "Could we possibly speak somewhere more private?"

[lugh-thecelt.livejournal.com]

"Not at all. I have run into a slight problem, though." My face stays the same even though I feel a strange mix of pride and frustration. His eyes move, surveying the street, then he looks at me again. "Could we possibly speak somewhere more private?"

I consider him for a moment, head titled slightly, then, "Aye. Your church."

This'd better be worth my time, Father.

[brotherlaurence.livejournal.com]

I give him a quick nod and head across the street, trusting he will follow me and not particularly concerned that he will kill me with my back turned. We reach my building, I unlock it, and let him follow me in. When the door's shut, I turn to him and sigh.

"For an exorcism, faith is imperative." Before he can interrupt, I continue. "There is a rite. Words that must be repeated by witnesses....And without the specific faith in those witnesses, I don't think it will work." There. I've said it and he can kill me for putting a wrench into his plans.

[lugh-thecelt.livejournal.com]

I follow him. He doesn't check to make sure I do, but I guess he'd rather not see his death coming if I chose to do that. I don't. It's not his fault that I'm angry. It's not his fault that Ares is gone and Eris has shut me out.

"For an exorcism, faith is imperative," he says once we're inside and then continues before I can say anything. "There is a rite. Words that must be repeated by witnesses....And without the specific faith in those witnesses, I don't think it will work."

I look away from him and lean against the wall, crossing my arms. A complication. My anger ebbs to be replaced by frustration. I nod and look up at him.

"So? This mean I need to round up the last Catholics the world over?"

[brotherlaurence.livejournal.com]

I laugh a little.

"I don't think the denomination matters so much as the god." I don't think he really would bring in others from out of town, but just in case, I add, "And bringing newcomers into this doesn't strike me as a good idea, either." He may kill me for that. I throw my arms wide and sigh. "I only know of maybe two other people in town that think of the Bible as more than a collection of myths. I can keep an eye out, but I don't really know how to ask after someone's beliefs then invite them into an exorcism. There has to be...some comfort there. Faith in each other as well as in God." This is sounding more and more impossible the more I speak.

[lugh-thecelt.livejournal.com]

"I don't think the denomination matters so much as the god." I smirk slightly at that. So true. All of the sects that broke free of the Catholic hierarchy more or less have the same foundation. It's the tower built up top that's a little different. "And bringing newcomers into this doesn't strike me as a good idea, either." I look at him in confusion now. Right now, it's only he and I. Anyone else is a newcomer. Wanda is not a follower of the Creator. The only other that would come close is Kaeli and she is not either.

He continues as I think about what he's already said. "I only know of maybe two other people in town that think of the Bible as more than a collection of myths. I can keep an eye out, but I don't really know how to ask after someone's beliefs then invite them into an exorcism. There has to be...some comfort there. Faith in each other as well as in God."

I sniff and nod again. In a way, I don't really care about this whole thing right now. But I know, after I handle what is truly pressing on my mind, that I'll want to handle Lucien's soul immediately. I push off the wall and walk away a little, turn and pace back towards Laurence.

"Who?"

[brotherlaurence.livejournal.com]

My heart drops down into my stomach, maybe even to my feet, and I stare at him. For some reason, it didn't occur to me that he'd want to include them. I should have known.

"Cain, kind of." I shake my head. "I don't really know how that would work. And," I hesitate, but finally say, "Kate O'Hara."

Don't ask me to bring her into this, Lúgh.

[lugh-thecelt.livejournal.com]

The Sinner. He not just believes, he knows. Sort of perfect, I think. "And Kate O'Hara." Laurence says her name hesitantly. There's so much reluctance to bring her up.

"You and Kate. You're not together anymore, right?"

But you wish you were. I can tell from your expression, Father, that you wish you were.

[brotherlaurence.livejournal.com]

"No," I say with an inward flinch. I hope it doesn't show. No, we're not together any more. Please don't ask me to bring her into this or I may try to kill you and that just means I'll die here instead of doing something for Him and I don't think I would care one whit. "We're not."

[lugh-thecelt.livejournal.com]

He's unhappy about it. Just like I thought. I've been in his position too recently. How amusing is that? A god and a servant of a higher god, conversing of a conspiracy and understanding one another's pain. I wonder if he would understand the pain I feel right now...

I smile at him. It's not a happy smile, but not an "I'm going to kill you now" smile, either. It's my responsibility to gather what we need for this, whether that is materials or people. Were they still together, I would default to him to ask her or not. They are not, though, which means the decision should be hers and I should be the one to ask. Likewise with the Sinner.

"I'm sorry you aren't, Laurence. You seemed well-suited to each other. I'm not much judge of relationships, though," I add with a shrug.

[brotherlaurence.livejournal.com]

I give him a short nod, keeping all the emotion in that I can.

"Thank you." Then my lips quirk and I say, "But if I may say so, you and your wife seem to be very well suited." Both slightly insane and both very attractive. Not to mention the way I have seen them with each other. It's almost shameless, but also something I envy in a way. "I'll see if there's a way around the witnesses, if I can." I am not hopeful. "It is just to be you and I and the doctor, correct?"

[lugh-thecelt.livejournal.com]

"Thank you. But if I may say so, you and your wife seem to be very well suited." I smile at that.

"We are." There's no one, no worshiper, no other god, I have ever met that matched me anywhere near as well as she. "I'm a lucky one."

"I'll see if there's a way around the witnesses, if I can. It is just to be you and I and the doctor, correct?"

"Yes," I lie. He won't find a way without witnesses. Religion and faith, as strong as it may be individually, requires numbers in order to thrive. And it must thrive in the face of a Hellion bastard like Marbas.

It's what this town lacks.

It's why I hate this town.

[brotherlaurence.livejournal.com]

"OK," I say and offer him a handshake. "It sounds silly to say to a god, but if you need anything, I'm usually here." He could kill me for that, too. Then I nod at the far room where I've been sleeping and studying. "I'll go back to studying, then." With a smile, I leave him. He won't steal anything and he'll shut the door. There's nothing I have that he could possibly want.

[lugh-thecelt.livejournal.com]

"Thank you, Father." I watch him walk away, leaving me here, unattended, in his Church. The wood at the sill has been replaced. The work that's been done in here is good. Masterful, even. My eyes go up to the Cross and I study it. Whoever crafted it-- I suspect it was Laurence-- took their time with it, grooving it perfectly. There is no space between the crossing plank and the rising plank. Flawless.

I blink a few times, unsure of why I stare at it like I do. Something about it... I step in closer, stopping right in front of the pulpit.

And I kneel with both knees on the floor.

In a voice so quiet I'm not even sure I speak aloud, I say,

"Help me."