I am not so terribly drunk that I am stumbling over my own feet, but cobblestones can be tricky on the driest and sunniest of days, so I make sure to take my time as I walk. Coming home with a twisted ankle is not a present I want to give my wife.

I have my eyes on the road, so when I hear a woman's voice address me, I am surprised. Even more so when I realize who is doing the addressing.

"Think it might be hedging closer to morning," I reply, then note the way she's eyeing up the bottle. "Birthday present for Wanda." I offer in explanation then look around. Know Wanda told me she was more partial to nights, but...

"What has you out so late?"