Change is the constant, the signal for rebirth, the egg of the phoenix.

[bakeneko-excolo.livejournal.com]

Day 110, Friday, September 18th, evening

Change is swift and slow at once. Two days ago I would not be walking to pick Luke up for our (third!) date. Two days ago I was comfortable with our friendship. Now this has happened, and if I cannot say I am comfortable it is due to the feeling in my stomach that says anticipation and happiness and nervousness.

When I met Luke for our dinner date last night, Samuel did not seem upset. Perhaps surprised? There is no reason to be nervous after all. He knows me from picking up the packets after all...oh dear.

The smell of paper and leather and something that always seems to say 'travel' greets me as I enter. I raise my hand to Samuel as I walk towards him, shaking my head when he says there is not much for me to pick up. "Konbanwa, Samuel-san. No thank you, I shall come back for that. I am currently here to pick up Luke-kun again." I am saved from seeing his expression when I catch sight of Luke coming towards me. I must be so predictable, as the sight of him always brings the same smile to my face.

[Open to Luke] Closed.

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[a-cheval.livejournal.com]

Still in the back room when I hear Samuel talking to someone, and it must be someone he don't mind much, cause it's bang on six and usually he'd just tell 'em we were closed. Only then I hear Boku's voice and I straighten right up. "No thank you, I shall come back for that. I am currently here to pick up Luke-kun again." Oh bloody hell. Scramble through from the back and there he is looking all... him, and I smile a bit even if I'm thinking aw, hell, Samuel, don't say nothing. "Are you now." Damn it, there he goes with the look and all. Don't do the look, Samuel, bloody hell.

Bite my lip and edge out from behind the counter and I damn near take his hand too only I stop short of that, cause I ain't bloody stupid. "Hey," I say. Don't blush for fuck's sake Luke, don't blush, don't. "Yep. He come out on Cimarron with me last night. He's a real good rider," I say, cause that stuff counts with Samuel even if it ain't strictly relevant. Only he just says, "Is he," and I don't really know what to make of that so I just nod.

[bakeneko-excolo.livejournal.com]

I finally take my eyes off him when I hear Samuel's, "Are you now." Luke comes to stand beside me and I carefully keep my eyes on his brother, the smile faded from the light Luke brought to it to something merely friendly. "Hai, I am."

Luke speaks of riding together last night and I nod, "Cimarron is rather headstrong, but I found him to have a very good pace. His trot would likely have been better if he had not been so impatient." I grin then at Samuel, all bristly older brother, and bow very respectfully. "Samuel-san, it was pleasant to see you again. I hope to see much more of you from now on," and then I take Luke's hand in mine and beam.

[a-cheval.livejournal.com]

"Cimarron is rather headstrong, but I found him to have a very good pace. His trot would likely have been better if he had not been so impatient." Samuel don't say nothing to that, but his eyebrows crank up a bit higher and he folds his arms. Opens his mouth to speak even, but then Boku bows and I don't reckon Samuel knows quite what to make of that, cause he gets this sorta grimace on his face like he don't really know what to do. "Samuel-san, it was pleasant to see you again. I hope to see much more of you from now on," says Boku, then I feel his hand round mine and he's grinning and -- oh bloody hell!

Well, he's holding onto my hand now so I tug him out by it, tossing a mumbled "bye Samuel!" over my shoulder and ducking out the door. Damn the bloody office to hell being all windows down one side, cause I can see Samuel in there giving me this look all with his eyebrows and I blush right up to my hair. Hell.

"Um." Boku looks pretty bloody pleased with himself too. "Well, that's you and Samuel met, then," I say, and I snort a bit and give him a look from the side. "He broke Cimarron in you know. He'll be all rankled 'bout that." Smile and bite my lip. Ain't seen no one talk to Samuel like that before 'cept dad and Elias. We're round the corner now thank fuck, and I stop to pull my jacket on, still laughing a bit. "Do him good, I reckon."

[bakeneko-excolo.livejournal.com]

I have barely taken his hand before he is dragging me out the door with it. I wave at Samuel as we leave, managing to keep my laughter from bubbling out until we are outside. Given the windows, I am fairly sure he sees it but I simply cannot keep it contained any longer. It is short lived and stops once Luke starts talking.

"Well, that's you and Samuel met, then," I try and nod solemnly, but a grin keeps cracking it. "He broke Cimarron in you know. He'll be all rankled 'bout that." I gesture in the negative as he starts to place his coat on, "I meant that Cimarron knew how, he was just stubborn and impatient and..." I trail off as I see Luke's expression. "Do him good, I reckon." Oh. Well then. I grin back at him. "Yes, perhaps it will."

Take his hand back in mine, "What would you like to do? I believe it is my turn to take you for a meal?" For our third date. Not that I am counting (three).

[a-cheval.livejournal.com]

Seems to me like all that grinning's gone to his head. "Yes, perhaps it will." So bloody cheeky I can't help grinning again, nudging my shoulder up against his. Bloody right, mind. Then he catches my hand again, right where we are, and I dunno, you'd reckon I'd be used to it after a couple of days, stuff like that out in the open (cause, technically, I did kiss him in the street - twice - and thank fuck Samuel ain't heard about that, cause he wouldn't like that even if I weren't queer, going about doing that). Um. "What would you like to do? I believe it is my turn to take you for a meal?"

What'd I like to do. Hell, I'd do just 'bout anything. "That's good," I say, looking down and smiling to myself. "That's- um. Yeah. Anything." He's still smiling at me when I look up. "Anything, really." Smile at him slowly, then I hear the office door open round the corner and even if it ain't nothing to do with us, probably just Samuel going over the road or something, my eyes widen a bit and I start off down the road pretty sharpish, shooting him a bit of a grin.

[bakeneko-excolo.livejournal.com]

"That's- um. Yeah. Anything." Living in an attic makes it difficult to prepare food for oneself, let alone a guest. Perhaps I should talk to Lydia about a small kitchen of some sort, the way she provided the bathroom nook when Neko was trapped in her form. "I would like to share some more dishes from my country at the cafe then." Tulzcha is always able to prepare them so authentically.

I am not sure what happened, but Luke is suddenly walking swiftly down the street and I must scramble to keep up at first. His grin distracts me from asking what it was and soon enough we are at the cafe in any case. I order at the counter while Luke finds us a table and within moments we have the first course of tea and vegetable tempura appetizers. She even provides chopsticks every time I am here.

"Itatakimasu, would you like me to show you the chopsticks today Luke-kun?" Yesterday at breakfast I noticed him watch me eat with them.

[a-cheval.livejournal.com]

I sorta like having him order stuff. Means I get to learn all words for food and that, plus I reckon Tulzcha likes being able to practise cause she always smile at him real nice. By the time we got our food I'm just about noticing how bloody hungry I am, seeing as I ate early before the farm run. "Itatakimasu, would you like me to show you the chopsticks today Luke-kun?"

Guess he noticed me watching him again. Blush a bit and watch him take a bite. I dunno that eating with sticks is as civilised as he makes out, frankly, but he makes it look all proper and that, so I'm sorta curious. Also, he has real nice hands. Just saying. Fuck knows how he gets 'em to work like that though, the chopsticks, only then I realise I'm sorta scowling at 'em so I stop that. "Um." Bite my lip and nod after a moment. "Yeah. Sorta. Won't be no good with 'em, mind."

[bakeneko-excolo.livejournal.com]

He seems a bit cross at first, scowling at my hands. Yet when he looks at me he seems puzzled, not angry. "Yeah. Sorta. Won't be no good with 'em, mind." I tilt my head at that, "Anything worth doing is not likely perfect on the first try, I think." I shift a little closer until our thighs touch and place his pair in his hands. I have noticed Tulzcha always brings a set of utensils as well as chopsticks when I order. She is very thoughtful.

I place only one stick in his hand at first and show it in mine as well. "This piece stays still in relation to your hand." I add the second and demonstrate it moving before placing the second in his hand and guiding the movements. "Together, they pinch the food."

[a-cheval.livejournal.com]

"Anything worth doing is not likely perfect on the first try, I think." That makes me grin cause I swear to god, he sounds just like Elias. I mean, 's probably true, but still. "Sound like my brother," I tell him, while he's moving to sit close to me. "Not Samuel," I add, cause I dunno that he'd appreciate it much, sounding like him. "Elias. He's always going on about how you got to stick at stuff even if you ain't no good, or... well, mostly even if you don't like it, but it's sorta the same I guess. He reckons it's better if you're bad at something so you can appreciate being good."

"This piece stays still in relation to your hand. Together, they pinch the food." Watch him doing it, and let him put 'em in my hand, only I dunno if I'm not holding 'em hard enough or something, cause they don't really... move right. And when I try and pick something up with 'em, they sorta slip past each other. Frown at 'em and try again, and his leg's all warm up against mine and that ain't helping no one. Shoot him a little smile from the side, and for a bit I sorta forget to look away again. Then I grin and duck my head a bit. "Reckon it'll need some practise."

[bakeneko-excolo.livejournal.com]

He tries a few times, but somehow the food always escapes. By his expression, it seems he may be blaming the food and the chopsticks of conspiring. His smile catches me and when he looks away I realize I have been holding my food in midair the entire time. "Reckon it'll need some practise." I nod and nudge his hand to the fork just as Tulzcha brings the next course. "We can practice another time. You look quite hungry."

We quietly eat for a few minutes, I admit I am distracted by his thigh against mine as I did not move away once the teaching had finished. Instead, I wrap my foot around his so our ankles are hooked together.

[a-cheval.livejournal.com]

"We can practice another time. You look quite hungry." Well, he ain't wrong there. Take a bite, but he wraps his leg round mine under the table and that sets me to blushing, obviously. 's like my face ain't got nothing better to do. Take a deep breath and let it out slow, sorta laughing quietly at the same time. "Probably right. I am, I ain't had nothing since before the farm run." And it's good, too, even if it's all sorta weird and not how you expect it to taste just from looking at it, and his side's all warm up against mine. "Don't mind though, I like getting out on runs again. Does my head in being in the office."

Then I'm quiet for a bit cause I don't know if I want to bring it up, but hell, he's real good for talking 'bout stuff to, so I do. "Lars got back from Dry Run this morning. He done the thursday run this week." Finish the mouthful I'm eating and glance at him from the side. "He reckons- um. He reckons there's weird stuff going on in the woods."

[bakeneko-excolo.livejournal.com]

Perhaps meals are a good way to start our time together then, at least then I can ensure he is eating. He is cheerful enough when he smiles at me, but I can almost smell an underlying stress to him. The week he has had so far, this is not surprising.

"He reckons- um. He reckons there's weird stuff going on in the woods." I pause the bite of food and place my chopsticks down. "Did he describe the weirdness?" It is bad enough should townsfolk have problems in the town, but Luke has had enough trauma this week. Dry Run is one that he does the run on as well.

[a-cheval.livejournal.com]

Just nod at first, cause I ain't making a big deal out of it. 'Part from anything else, right, I mostly manage to keep different bits of me for different stuff, and being with Boku ain't when the bit of me for being upset's in charge. That mostly only happens when I don't have to be okay, like when I'm on my own and that. Sorta tiring, but it works, mostly. "He looked a bit shook up. Seen him when I went down to eat this morning. Said... noises, mostly."

And I stop and wrinkle my nose before going on. Scared the hell out of me when I heard it this morning, knowing what he was hearing. "Howling, mainly. Like... you know. Wolves, but not." Go back to eating then, but I can feel him a tensing a bit where we're touching. "I give him that charm you give me, the jar with the stuff in it, so it ain't like he'd be in danger or nothing. I'll take it monday, too."

[bakeneko-excolo.livejournal.com]

As he describes the howling, I feel the hairs on the back of my neck rise and my muscles tense as I fight to stay still. The god of Black and Blue was not satisfied with his attack upon Luke and Freya. Perhaps he is remembering what he once was and is trying to reclaim his lost time. Little god, your time is over.

"I give him that charm you give me, the jar with the stuff in it, so it ain't like he'd be in danger or nothing. I'll take it monday, too." I stroke my fingers along his wrist, "Thank you Luke-kun. It was thoughtful to share with your co-worker. I am glad you will not be without it when you must make the run." I blink as I try and clear the upset from me. I do not wish to ruin our (third) date.

That thought brings another to mind, "What is your work schedule this weekend? Do you have plans?" I find even two days in I am greedy for his time, but do not wish to press myself should he need his space.

[a-cheval.livejournal.com]

"Course," I say, "and I ain't said his name or nothing neither." Cause I remember what he said. All comes out a bit mumbled though, cause he strokes his fingers over my wrist, and it makes me shiver a bit. But his eyes are sorta narrowed and I start thinking 'bout what Johnny said 'bout Ojiisan then, and I bite my lip. "Yesterday morning, right, I went to see Johnny Theiss after I seen you." Don't really got much of an idea of how to say it without it coming off like I was a bit of a bastard. "I knew 'bout him being... what he is already. Ares told me. Only I wanted to see him myself, 'stead of letting him go, cause.." Trail off a bit. Ain't no need to go explaining it to him.

"He was with that dog god, that night. That's why I wanted to see him, to tell him- you know. Tell him off, I guess." Look down a bit and bite my lip. "I hit him. And I know you said he ain't what- what he seems, or whatever, but I dunno if you know what, or- Yeah. Anyway that's why I went. But it weren't him in the woods, in case you think that."

"What is your work schedule this weekend? Do you have plans?"

"Got the farm run to do tomorrow, and I'll be out most of the morning too. I reckon... I might see about changing the run. Don't much like coming through them woods no more, not in the dark. I mean... you have to go through 'em. But the road stays in for a long time. Samuel says I can have a half mile detour, so I'll see about finding one tomorrow." Then I realise maybe he weren't just asking out of interest, and I grin. "Um. 's just that though. Done by three, probably. Ain't working on sunday neither, we could... I mean, if you wanted to do something, we could. I'd like that. If- if you wanted."

[bakeneko-excolo.livejournal.com]

I almost choke on my tea when he says he struck the pup. "Hit him?" He does not move as if he was harmed. So perhaps the pup has realized his wrong? Of course, the piece where Ares told him is not quite all of the data either.

Tracing my fingers along the rim of the cup, I lift my eyes to his, "Eh, Luke-kun? We had something to do with Ares knowing that data..." I do not wish the spoil our evening, but I find I cannot hide this from him.

"He came to visit the other day. Spoke with Koneko for enough time to find out what we only discovered this week." I wrinkle my nose, "He reeked of wolf when Ojiisan met him at the bakery."

[a-cheval.livejournal.com]

"Hit him?" Nod, but I'm sorta wondering if maybe he dont think that was right, cause he certainly looks shocked. "He hurt Freya," I say, trying to explain. "He hurt her, I ain't having that, Boku, I can't be having that. You never saw her, she was real bad." But it ain't like he'd ever really tell me off or nothing. "I... I only did it once. I was real angry. But he was real sorry, and he's real nice when you talk to him, and he's sorta young, ain't he, so it ain't like I'd do nothing... bad or... I aint like that. You know, anyway," I say, cause he does, and I grin at him a bit.

But he's looking sorta sheepish. "Eh, Luke-kun? We had something to do with Ares knowing that data... He came to visit the other day. Spoke with Koneko for enough time to find out what we only discovered this week. He reeked of wolf when Ojiisan met him at the bakery." Ares is going to see Boku now? Um. I ain't really sure if I really like... well, I dunno. Maybe... maybe it's good if they ain't at each other's throats. "I- I never asked him how he knew. Just.. I dunno, figured it was a god thing." Sit back a bit, and I'm looking at him, but I ain't really thinking 'bout it. "You found out in the first place then, right?" Nod a bit and give him a bit of a smile. "Thanks. Only... you don't need to tell him, in future. Cause it ain't his business no more. 'sides, I sorted it myself," I add, and I grin a bit this time.

[bakeneko-excolo.livejournal.com]

I cross my arms in the negative when he tries to explain why he hit the pup, "Oh chigaou Luke-kun! I, we, were very cross at him ourselves," that may be an understatement, "Koneko told Ares our investigatory data as a measure to prevent me from expressing my opinion to him personally." I lower my eyes at the look on his face. "I was so upset you, and Freya, had been hurt." The piece I do not mention is should I get a chance at the god of Black and Blue, I shall surely take it.

"You found out in the first place then, right?" Nod a bit and give him a bit of a smile. "Thanks. Only... you don't need to tell him, in future. Cause it ain't his business no more. 'sides, I sorted it myself," I nod my head slowly at that. It makes me both sad for Ares, and something else. Something that feels good and breathless at once, that it implies that it, he, is my business.

I turn my hand from his wrist to twine with his fingers, it is simply too hard to not touch him, and nod. "I think you handled Johnny just right. I hope he wishes to be your friend more than...a packmate of his." Canines often follow the alpha leader. Hopefully Johnny is more man than wolf.

[a-cheval.livejournal.com]

...pretty sure "expressing his opinion" might've involved a bit of hitting too. Just a guess. Well, I ain't thinking 'bout that now. He didn't, is the point, and besides he'd not have been doing it cause of god stuff anyway, he'd've been doing it cause he likes me. Like how I stuck up for Freya. Ain't cause I own her, it's cause she's my friend. "'Kay," I say, and I don't say how I reckon Ares'd express it a bit loudly for anyone's liking, upset or not, cause... well, I don't want to be thinking about that too much.

Slides his fingers in between mine, and I think of last night when we was in the tavern drinking and how I took his hand under the table, and I reckon I like this way better even if it does get my heart racing real fast, doing it for folks to see. "I think you handled Johnny just right. I hope he wishes to be your friend more than...a packmate of his." Take a drink of tea and smile suddenly at that, cause it's real nice to hear. "Thanks," I say, ducking my head a bit. "I- I like him, I reckon. Even with the rest. I dunno, there ain't many folk in town I can... um. Identify with, I s'pose."

[bakeneko-excolo.livejournal.com]

"I- I like him, I reckon. Even with the rest. I dunno, there ain't many folk in town I can... um. Identify with, I s'pose."

I suppose identifying with a shapechanging wolf pup is not as odd as dating (dating!) a japanese yokai form. "It sounds like he could use a friend like you." Particularly given his current choice in companions. Next thing the foolish pup will do is something even more foolhardy, like visit the Tower.

With just a few more bites I find we have finished the meal and reach to pay. When Luke makes a protesting motion I raise his hand to my lips and shake my head, "My turn, Luke-kun." Perhaps it is silly, but the sight of the blood rising in his cheeks makes me wonder of how else I may make it rise.

"Would you like to go for a walk, it is early yet..."

[a-cheval.livejournal.com]

"It sounds like he could use a friend like you." And I guess that's true. He seemed like he never really said much about it to folk, like no one ever asked him about it even, and it must be pretty hard dealing with that all on your own. Ain't like Boku, he never grew up trying to fit in with people. 's not like I feel bad for Johnny exactly, more just that I reckon I don't know what I'd do if I was him. Sorta thinking 'bout it while I'm eating, cause I don't reckon he'll be able to holdoff being a wolf for ever, and I don't reckon he should have to neither, but with Lars hearing all that in the wood too, I dunno what he could do 'bout it.

By the time I finish he's already paying, and I try and say I'll go halves with him or something, only he ain't having it. Kisses my hand, instead. After that I can't say much of anything, just nod, and just sit there looking back at him and his eyes've gone all dark and I feel sorta hot all of a sudden. "My turn, Luke-kun. Would you like to go for a walk, it is early yet..."

"Sure," I say, and I'm pretty sure I shouldn't be looking at his mouth still even if I can feel it on my hand even now. Sorta forget to get up till he does, but I remember - just - to say thanks and night to Tulzcha when she gives us a nod from the kitchen door. Tis pretty early, mind, and I don't mind admitting I'm bloody glad, too, cause I ain't too keen on the thought of being around at night now with the hound god running about making a racket just outside town. Head the opposite direction to the stables. I reckon Samuel's had enough fun for one evening without spotting us walking past. "So, um, d'you want to do something at the weekend? I sorta... well, I want to come to the library, anyway, so..."

[bakeneko-excolo.livejournal.com]

We walk hand in hand and soon pass the stables. Turning, we start to walk along the river bank and the sound of the water is soothing. "So, um, d'you want to do something at the weekend? I sorta... well, I want to come to the library, anyway, so..."

"Yes, I should like to see you this weekend. My project work is quite flexible, so I am free at any time you are..." I then register the library. Does he mean to find books? Or does he want to spend some time in the attic? We just organized it, but perhaps I should ensure it is presentable. "The library? Anything particular or just reading for pleasure?"

[a-cheval.livejournal.com]

"Yes, I should like to see you this weekend. My project work is quite flexible, so I am free at any time you are..." Yeah, okay, and that's got me grinning like an idiot, only maybe he won't see, cause I look down at where I'm walking. I ain't really been down towards the river 'cept for running down to the smithy, but it's real nice. "The library? Anything particular or just reading for pleasure?"

"Um. Sorta. Want to look up stuff about... you know, him. The hound god. And then maybe werewolves and stuff too." Then I grin. "I reckon Johnny ain't much for reading as a rule."

It's pretty cold out, now. Coldest it's been this year so far in town, even if it don't seem too cold after you done a few runs right through winter. Wonder how cold it gets in Japan. "Well, that, and I just like it. Ain't really been in a while." Squeeze his hand and tuck it into his jacket pocket, so mine's in there as well, and even if I'm sorta curious I don't feel round to see what else is in there (although I am real curious and I reckon that feels like the corner of his notebook).

[bakeneko-excolo.livejournal.com]

I nod as he tells me his topics of interest. I quite agree with gathering information of course. Perhaps I could recommend some books to him for reading as well. Last night he mentioned enjoying the poem from Hermia's party. I am sure if Lydia does not have a book on Japanese poetry, I should have one in the attic.

He pushes our hands into my pocket and I do not realize how cold it has gotten until my notebook feels warm against the back of my hand. Keeping our hands there, I turn and stop our walk by wrapping my other arm about him. It immediately warms me from more than just our combined heat and I press my lips against the edge of his cheek and ear. "I have had a lovely evening tonight, Keibo-kun," I murmur.

[a-cheval.livejournal.com]

He pulls me to a stop and puts his arm around me, and I lean up against him a bit. Can feel his lips up against my ear and it makes me shiver a bit again, only not from being cold. "I have had a lovely evening tonight, Keibo-kun," he says. God. Think of the last time he called me that. Even if I can see the stars and that over his shoulder, and usually I like looking at 'em and working out which is which, I shut my eyes. I don't need 'em.

Turn my head enough so I can nuzzle up against his cheek a bit, till my mouth brushes up against his jaw and I smile. "Me too," I say, and it's true, cause I did, and sometimes in the day when I'm working or even on the run, I don't reckon I'll be able to have a nice time even if it's with him, and I don't reckon I'll be able to do nothing 'cept go and and just sit in the quiet and be upset cause it's so much easier to be upset than to not be upset, and I get so tired just being normal around folk and making myself not think about some things. But it ain't so much effort being happy round him. Ain't much of an effort at all. "Thanks." Slide my hand up onto his shoulder inside his jacket where it's all warm, and when I look at him he's looking right back at me. Brush my mouth up against the corner of his, and my heart's beating real hard, but I'm still smiling a bit. "I like that, when you call me that."

[bakeneko-excolo.livejournal.com]

My skin feels hot everywhere his skin touches, flaring with sensation when I can feel his lips smile against me. My heartbeat pounds in my ears as he snakes his hand under my jacket and I feel it's cool movement holding me to him. My breath pauses when he puts his mouth to mine, "I like that, when you call me that."

I turn my head and breathe softly into his mouth, "Keibo-kun," and then kiss him as I have been thinking of this entire evening. Soft at first, gentle movements of lip upon lip, then deepening until I taste his tongue and can feel rough edges of teeth scrape as a slight moan escapes.

[a-cheval.livejournal.com]

He says it again, right against my mouth, and I can feel myself blushing, only this time it's just cause I like it, hearing it again. And I wonder if that's the sorta thing I can say back to him or if- I dunno, if that ain't right somehow, only before I can think to ask him even he's kissing me, not pushy or nothing but getting deeper till his tongue's sliding up against mine and I can feel his lip real soft against my teeth. Oh, fuck.

Move my hand inside his jacket till my fingertips are up against the side of his neck, just to feel his skin, and I stroke 'em there and I can feel his pulse even, and it's beating sorta hard and that makes me gasp right up against his mouth. I don't even think of pulling back. Just kiss him deeper and press in against him real tight, and I take my hand out of his pocket to pull him closer, even. I don't want him to stop, not yet.

[bakeneko-excolo.livejournal.com]

The combination of the slight strokes against my neck and his gasp against my mouth is enough to make me light-headed. His returning kiss and tight grip seems to ground me though and I pull back just a bit to take his lower lip in my teeth. Looking into his eyes, I bite down just slightly before licking it.

Almost humming, I snake my own hands beneath his jacket. They end up slipping beneath his shirt as well and the skin of his back feels hot against my cooled hands. I trace the planes of his muscles up and squeeze him even tighter to me as I return to kissing him. I dip my tongue into his mouth to tease his own into mine and I slowly suck.

[a-cheval.livejournal.com]

Eventually he pulls back a bit and when I open my mouth to tell him not to, he bites my lip, real slow, still looking at me, and I feel hot all down my spine suddenly. Oh-- bloody hell. "Fuck." Gasp it between my teeth and grip the front of his shirt while there's room to, breathing sorta hard up against his cheek until his turns his head again, then kissing him hard. I ain't got it in me to keep at being slow while we're kissing, and he- well, he can prob'ly feel I ain't exactly eager to pull away just yet. Not just yet. Not with his hands all cold up against my back and his body all warm up against me. Cup the back of his neck and feel for the skin of his hip where his shirt's untucked. Can't not, really. Stroke my thumb there and pretty much forget everything but how hot his mouth feels up against mine. Goes on for the longest time, then I pull back just so's I can breathe, pressing my forehead hard up against his and holding onto him real tight.

[bakeneko-excolo.livejournal.com]

I am afraid when I feel his erection pressed against my hip a sound very like a growl spills into his mouth. I hungrily kiss him as his touch on my hip causes me to arch against him and then...

I am gasping air as he pulls away to rest his forehead upon mine. Yes. Taking it slow. I close my eyes and try and let the sound of the river calm my beating heart as it is echoed in the painful throbbing of my shaft. Despite the fact that he pulled away, he still holds me tight and I feel his body is as eager as my own.

A slight laugh escapes as I finally find myself able to speak. "Well, yes. Eh to ne, shall I walk you home?"

[a-cheval.livejournal.com]

Making noises like that when a person is trying to avoid just falling into bed with you at the drop of a hat, cause they maybe want to- cause- when they got their reasons even if they can't remember what their reasons are, well, that ain't fair. Specially if it makes 'em make these little whimpery noises and then get all embarrassed even if, well, they ain't exactly running off neither.

Then he's laughing! "Well, yes. Eh to ne, shall I walk you home?" Um. Yeah, sure, or maybe I could walk you home and then right inside and then other stuff... Sigh and bite my lip, muffling a bit of a laugh too. "'kay," I say, but I don't move. Grin sorta slow and kiss his jaw, then his mouth again, not real deep or nothing, just to taste his mouth again. Tangle my fingers in his hair and look at him a while, too, and he's just as breathless as I am. "I- Thanks," I say, cause I feel sorta bad then like I'm leading him on or something, only I ain't, not really. 's just... yeah. Keep my arm round his waist when I pull back, and lean up against him while we're walking along the riverbank.

[bakeneko-excolo.livejournal.com]

He agrees but then a slow smile spreads across his face and he kisses me once more. I struggle not to do more than taste his tongue against mine and just when I begin to fail he pulls away. I feel his hand tug in my hair when I nod to his, "Thanks," and we turn about to retrace our route back to town.

The air is cool on my face and I am soon grateful for the heat of our arms about each other, in addition to liking the feel of him so close. All too soon we reach his door, the walk having passed in a comfortable silence. I swing him around to face me and place both hands at his hips, "So you shall come by the library this weekend when you are free, yes?"

[a-cheval.livejournal.com]

When we get to my place he pulls me round to face him. Like his hands on me like that, like it's okay to just do that any time we want to, like it ain't bad or nothing, like it ain't secret, and I put my arms round his neck and I'm grinning like nothing else. "So you shall come by the library this weekend when you are free, yes?"

"Yep." And I'd say for him to come round here too any time he likes, only half the time I ain't here and I'm not about to go encouraging him and Samuel to give each other looks while I'm not about. "Prob'ly tomorrow," I say, cause even if I'm thinking sunday'll be better, I dunno who I'm kidding when I've got the afternoon free tomorrow and he's just down the road in a big house full of books. "I had fun," I say. "I mean... really. I really did." But I reckon he can tell that, cause I ain't stopped smiling since we got here. "Night, Boku."

[bakeneko-excolo.livejournal.com]

"I had fun. I mean... really. I really did." I return his smile and nod, "I really enjoyed our time together, I shall look forward to seeing you tomorrow." I lean close as he says, "Night, Boku." and brush my lips over his like a promise. "Goodnight, Luke-kun," swiftly walking down the stairs before my tenuous will breaks once more.

I grin the entire way back to the attic.